Yeah I have something to bitch about, goddamn rightfully so too.
So you do all you can, and you get jack shit for it.. it happens. However, when it continually happens in many aspects of life, you get a little fed up with it to say the least. So here's how it starts - and funny that she was the reason I started this blog to begin with. Things had been a little dicey between my girlfriend and I for a little while, most of those things I will not get into as to protect her right to privacy and to a lesser extent her right to not being embarassed over some not so savory decisions to say the least. Anyhow, things were seemingly looking up, and over the past week some things were said that showed promise. Things like (albeit a little too cliche, it was sweet) "You make me complete," "I just feel a stronger connection with you than I have anyone else," etc... Now telling me is one thing, showing me is requisite, and quite another thing altogether.
So I have had a tough go of it lately with worrying about school, not being sure about everything in life, and generally somewhat depressed and overwhelmed - we have all been there from time to time. So who do you usually turn to in these instances, but a loved one, the one person you should hold most important in your life. Right? Well, I certainly thought so, and I suppose in this instance I was wrong. After having what I thought was a decent, productive, conversation, I later found out that it was simply "annoying" and "stressful." Well I just HATE that my own emotional needs - which included "the little things" that we all need from our partner, such as a call here, text there, saying they love you, miss you, what have you - were such an annoyance and so much to ask, that it was grounds for those feelings of completion and connection to dissipate right into thin air. Clearly these were strong rooted and thoughtful feelings, and not just something to flap your gums recklessly about (note the sarcasm.) Now, this conversation did not include all of the "little things" talk, some of that came in the next day or two, but when things are merely talked about, and no progress is shown, they tend to come up once again.
Bringing us to Saturday...
Saturday morning I decide to make a call after not hearing from my girlfriend other than briefly on friday. I simply wondered why things hadn't seemed the same, and why I was most often the only one to initiate contact between the two of us etc? This was met with a not so welcoming sentiment, and led to the events of the day. Long story short, she decided that in a matter of a day and a half, those feelings expressed to me, the ones that meant the world to me - as I told her - had simply vanished, and that she no longer felt anything for me. Disappointing to say the least. Perhaps the most disappointing aspect of it all was after the initial, hasty, decision, a reneging, then after calming my worst fears, a telephone call in which I was informed that she did NOT, after all, care for me... Wow, thanks for that one.
Quite frankly, I should have seen it coming all along. From her past "indiscretions," to the aforementioned seeming lack of concern or interest, to the fact that I always did my best to put in 110% effort, although I continually and consistently got nowhere near that in return - emotionally, financially (not that this part really matters), physically, you name it. Now maybe its a stretch, but a couple of things, favors, had just recently gone down.. and part of me is afraid I got used for those favors, but I would like to think that is out of the realm of possibility on her part?
I suppose there comes a point in everyone's life where they emotionally mature to the extent that they are ready for a real relationship, a lasting, meaningful relationship. Without doubt, one party was and remains there, the other unfortunately had/has not yet reached a level that is necessary for things to work. Some, (especially the subject of this blog) would question the validity of the above statement concerning emotional maturity and relationships, on the basis of me assuming I know everything about anything. This is far from the truth, and quite honestly that belief is something that has been cultivated in my mind through life lessons learned, and experiences from the past and present. I personally took quite some time to come to the understanding of what it takes in a relationship, and thankfully so. However, I'm sure that to some degree, my well rounded understanding of this concept probably allows me to be somewhat jaded, and overly expecting of others, when it comes to their level of understanding.
Point being in all of this folks, treat people right, be honest with each other, and for Fuck's sake, if someone treats you well and someone loves you enough to make sacrifices for you, to do the little things to let you know how they feel, tries to communicate well with you, and wants nothing but to provide you with everything they can, don't fuck them over, don't smile in their face while you stab them in the back. Be appreciative of what/who you have, because these people and these opportunities don't come around very often.
All of the above being said, there are two conclusions that most outsiders, or even people that know me, maybe even the subject of the blog, will come to - and they're both wrong.
1. I certainly know that I did not do everything right in that relationship, it was a learn on the go experience for me, as I only reached that level of emotional maturity I spoke of DURING said relationship. While I did try to be as much of a shoulder, lover, provider, and friend as I could be, I admittedly made my share of mistakes - but all within the overriding, loving sentiment that I felt and still feel to this day.
2. She is NOT a bad person. Not by any stretch of the imagination, and I love her more than I ever thought I could, more each time I wake up in the morning (ok so sometimes afternoon.) At times the people I know who don't know her as well as I do, have unintentionally been misled into assuming she was never good to me, perhaps because when things were good I simply kept my smile and my happiness inside, quietly enjoying the best thing I ever had to this date. Without doubt, that sweet, caring, supportive, beautiful, person exists - believe me, I've seen glimpses of it over the past 11 months or so.
I certainly wish communication between two people was as easy as the concept of it leads you to believe, and I do believe that it is attainable with a level of understanding and selflessness. Sometimes life is a motherfucker, and while this is certainly one of those times, perhaps with a little patience things will be easy once again.
"So now I wander through my days,
Trying to find a way through these feelings that I've felt,
I saved for you and no one else,
And though as long as this road seems,
I know its called the street of dreams."
"So bittersweet, this tragedy wont ask for absolution,
This melody inside of me, still searches for solution,
A twist of fate, the change of heart kills my infatuation,
A broken heart provides the spark for my determination."
Own your feelings, Use Your Illusions - Andy
Monday, September 29, 2008
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Rants, Musings, Life Lessons, ME - Its been a while, its time.
Most of you know I'm a passionate person. Be it the game, be it my friends, be it my knowledge, my interests, my opinions, my facts I refuse to let you dispute and that you simply can not disprove, I get a little fired up.
OK I'm back, had to run to the store and hop on the Nightrain real quick
Knowing I have a fiery personality, some people know how to hit that button, where it is, what it does, and how its going to effect me. Now clearly this goes for anyone, everyone has a breaking point. However, I'm gonna come out and say it - there are some people you don't fuck with like that, and its not because they are some badass or any horseshit like that. It has to do with who YOU are, YOUR relationship to them, and most importantly, WHAT the topic of conversation is. For me, it is those things that I am overly passionate about, the things I put infinite effort and thought into, essentially what I live for. I strive to be my best at some things and to, and for some people, and when I get that thrown back into my face by the wrong people, quite frankly it makes me wonder how much or even if they care in end.
Baseball. Baseball may seem like an insignificant thing to a vast majority of people in this world; this I can understand. However, let me put baseball into perspective for you.
A. Take 25 years of upbringing, mental conditioning.
B. Take two of the most inspirational people in your life (Dad, Coach Helfant RIP)
C. Take something that alluded you, something that spurned you when you needed it most
D. Take a second chance to recapture something you missed for so long
E. Take a measure of success, a glimpse into what might could have been had circumstances played out differently
F. Take a great deal of effort and thought put towards something in order to give yourself and others an outlet, and something to be proud of
G. Take a once in a lifetime chance to share something with your father, to be the catalyst that sparks something that he orchestrates, the apex member of his team
This is what baseball means to me, the niche that it has found in my life. Baseball may not be as important as family, may not be as commendable as sticking up for your friends, but in the end, for me, it is more than a game - it is a creative outlet and something that lives in my soul, it is my albatross, at the same time being my great conquest. My teacher, my absolute goal, it is all of these things because it is so much more than just baseball. If you can dig what I'm saying then you understand that this is about more than just a game, if you don't, then you quite simply don't comprehend me.
"OK Andy, so what's the fuckin' point??"
- Understandable, hold your fuckin' horses, I'm getting there.
There is a reason why I explained to you what baseball means to me, but I won't divulge the entire backlog of what transpired etc...
Here's the gist of it - IF you really care about someone, do what you can not to trash their dreams, not to mindfuck them pertaining to something they care that deeply about. Yeah I had this happen to me, and yeah I know that if I have good stats I shouldn't care, but my ability was not just trashed, it was all of what I explained to you, all of what means the most to me. Lets say, for instance, that someone off the street tells me I suck as a ballplayer, even someone on the other team I happen to be playing - You all know what comin' - they can suck my dick. Now that's a fact, and another fact might be that I would say that to ANYONE who told me I am a shit ballplayer, but the latter fact may just be a coverup for "wow, you just tore off a piece of my soul, may I have that fucker back?"
Point being folks, just 'cause you're pissed at someone, and just cause you know that one thing to say to fuck their shit up, doesn't mean you should go for the killshot. Chances are, you know not what you speak of, and even if you do, probably don't understand the magnitude of what it means to the other person. We all play the cocksucker sometimes, (wow cocksucker doesn't come up as a misspelled word on here haha) and I give creedence to, and legitimize being the cocksucker sometimes (figureativley of course) but you can really distance yourself from someone, or even take yourself out of that part of their life totally, if you say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Just because you know HOW to hurt someone, does not mean its good for you in the long run.
Think about this shit folks, and go fuckin' apologize to whomever you last suckerpunched, 'cause it may mean more to them than you know - or they may jack your shit, I don't know - but either way, you'll either feel better or get what you deserve.
BTW - here are my stats in 2008 through 11 games:
AVG: .353 (2nd - but I have a shit-ton more AB's than the 1st guy)
OBP: .500 (leads team)
OPS: .970 something (2nd)
RBI: 12 (leads team)
R: 7 (ain't my fault nobody knocks me in)
HR: 1 (leads team)
SB: 9 (2nd, plus TWO of them are steals of HOME - suck on that for a while)
I may play in a shit league, but that's some quality fucking numbers right there.
War Eagle, Blow me, Djenkue, Jaegsemesh, whatever, I'm out - Andy
OK I'm back, had to run to the store and hop on the Nightrain real quick
Knowing I have a fiery personality, some people know how to hit that button, where it is, what it does, and how its going to effect me. Now clearly this goes for anyone, everyone has a breaking point. However, I'm gonna come out and say it - there are some people you don't fuck with like that, and its not because they are some badass or any horseshit like that. It has to do with who YOU are, YOUR relationship to them, and most importantly, WHAT the topic of conversation is. For me, it is those things that I am overly passionate about, the things I put infinite effort and thought into, essentially what I live for. I strive to be my best at some things and to, and for some people, and when I get that thrown back into my face by the wrong people, quite frankly it makes me wonder how much or even if they care in end.
Baseball. Baseball may seem like an insignificant thing to a vast majority of people in this world; this I can understand. However, let me put baseball into perspective for you.
A. Take 25 years of upbringing, mental conditioning.
B. Take two of the most inspirational people in your life (Dad, Coach Helfant RIP)
C. Take something that alluded you, something that spurned you when you needed it most
D. Take a second chance to recapture something you missed for so long
E. Take a measure of success, a glimpse into what might could have been had circumstances played out differently
F. Take a great deal of effort and thought put towards something in order to give yourself and others an outlet, and something to be proud of
G. Take a once in a lifetime chance to share something with your father, to be the catalyst that sparks something that he orchestrates, the apex member of his team
This is what baseball means to me, the niche that it has found in my life. Baseball may not be as important as family, may not be as commendable as sticking up for your friends, but in the end, for me, it is more than a game - it is a creative outlet and something that lives in my soul, it is my albatross, at the same time being my great conquest. My teacher, my absolute goal, it is all of these things because it is so much more than just baseball. If you can dig what I'm saying then you understand that this is about more than just a game, if you don't, then you quite simply don't comprehend me.
"OK Andy, so what's the fuckin' point??"
- Understandable, hold your fuckin' horses, I'm getting there.
There is a reason why I explained to you what baseball means to me, but I won't divulge the entire backlog of what transpired etc...
Here's the gist of it - IF you really care about someone, do what you can not to trash their dreams, not to mindfuck them pertaining to something they care that deeply about. Yeah I had this happen to me, and yeah I know that if I have good stats I shouldn't care, but my ability was not just trashed, it was all of what I explained to you, all of what means the most to me. Lets say, for instance, that someone off the street tells me I suck as a ballplayer, even someone on the other team I happen to be playing - You all know what comin' - they can suck my dick. Now that's a fact, and another fact might be that I would say that to ANYONE who told me I am a shit ballplayer, but the latter fact may just be a coverup for "wow, you just tore off a piece of my soul, may I have that fucker back?"
Point being folks, just 'cause you're pissed at someone, and just cause you know that one thing to say to fuck their shit up, doesn't mean you should go for the killshot. Chances are, you know not what you speak of, and even if you do, probably don't understand the magnitude of what it means to the other person. We all play the cocksucker sometimes, (wow cocksucker doesn't come up as a misspelled word on here haha) and I give creedence to, and legitimize being the cocksucker sometimes (figureativley of course) but you can really distance yourself from someone, or even take yourself out of that part of their life totally, if you say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Just because you know HOW to hurt someone, does not mean its good for you in the long run.
Think about this shit folks, and go fuckin' apologize to whomever you last suckerpunched, 'cause it may mean more to them than you know - or they may jack your shit, I don't know - but either way, you'll either feel better or get what you deserve.
BTW - here are my stats in 2008 through 11 games:
AVG: .353 (2nd - but I have a shit-ton more AB's than the 1st guy)
OBP: .500 (leads team)
OPS: .970 something (2nd)
RBI: 12 (leads team)
R: 7 (ain't my fault nobody knocks me in)
HR: 1 (leads team)
SB: 9 (2nd, plus TWO of them are steals of HOME - suck on that for a while)
I may play in a shit league, but that's some quality fucking numbers right there.
War Eagle, Blow me, Djenkue, Jaegsemesh, whatever, I'm out - Andy
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Don't Be An Asshole - Yes, Coming From ME
It seems as though its true that you learn things everyday - I don't doubt that. However, sometimes its not just learning something, its more focusing on something due to self evaluation. Some of you know me well, some that read this may only know me to a degree, or may have known me a long time ago. For those of you who do currently know me well, you know my stance for a while has been to leave people the fuck alone - don't pick on people, because why on earth would you want to make someone feel like shit for no good reason? Now is when a multitude of people will jump ship, saying "Andy is the asshole, he is the guy who picks on people." While that statement would be way off base, A. I can see where things might get misconstrued, and B. I did do that today and it sucks.
Lets start with A. (Its kinda like 1, you can't really go wrong starting here.) I can understand, due to my high frequency of finding myself in confrontations, that people might assume that I am an asshole and I pick on people. This just is not the case - its quite the opposite. Take a recent example or two: This weekend at my friend Chris's family tailgate... There is one tailgater who is often a problem, not only at the tailgate but in life in general. This unnamed person named Josh essentially gets on everyone he meets nerves, but nobody ever says anything about. Drunk, not drunk, vulgar, not vulgar, its always there - on top of that its usually totally inappropriate for the setting/company. Even I had put up with the bullshit for quite some time, but this weekend it came to a culmination when Josh decided to berate the Yankees (not that I honestly care if he does, but the subject isnt the point, its the manner in which he goes about it) by grabbing my shoulders and shaking me around, asking how I liked the playoffs etc. OK. Back to those of you who know me, this is simply not something I deal with. I am not a bully, but I am an alpha male figure who doesn't deal with others playing down to me or attempting to make me feel lesser - especially amongst a gathering of my friends. I could sense that everyone else was tired of the obnoxious behavior as well, so instead of just taking the bullshit and letting it go, I proceeded with the following. I grabbed Josh and calmly told him that I was tired of his bullshit everytime I saw him, everyone else was tired of it, and if he didn't do away with the grin on his face while I spoke to him that I would gladly knock it off - add in some extra uses of the word fuck in there as well.
OK lets analyze this - why was I NOT the asshole here? Well first of all, I was thanked by all others present for doing what I did. I had every right to say/do what I did, and I did it for one reason and one reason only - everyone else seems afraid/reluctant to say anything to these types of people. I do not actively seek out confrontation, I'm just a protector. I stand up for myself, as well as those who are unwilling to stand up for themselves. Its as simple as that - however, if you're like me (there aren't many of us) don't just take that stance and say you do this - ALWAYS do it. Don't slip up like I did today.
I won't get into specifics of what went down today, but I essentially pulled a mean trick on someone I don't know, who did not necessarily deserve it. It makes you think, but it also makes you feel good about your true feelings when you slip up like I did, and the 1st thought that comes to your mind is how bad you feel for the other person. I can almost blame the protector side of me for even having done this - but in the end I should have thought about the situation and why my subconscious only THOUGHT protection was needed when it really wasn't.
If I could tell everyone who doesn't understand me one thing, I think I would go with this analogy: On the outside I may seem like the bully. However, in reality I'm the person that confronts the bully because nobody else will. Just be nice to people in general - if I can honestly see the world this way, anyone can - all of you who have known me for a long time can attest to that.
Lets start with A. (Its kinda like 1, you can't really go wrong starting here.) I can understand, due to my high frequency of finding myself in confrontations, that people might assume that I am an asshole and I pick on people. This just is not the case - its quite the opposite. Take a recent example or two: This weekend at my friend Chris's family tailgate... There is one tailgater who is often a problem, not only at the tailgate but in life in general. This unnamed person named Josh essentially gets on everyone he meets nerves, but nobody ever says anything about. Drunk, not drunk, vulgar, not vulgar, its always there - on top of that its usually totally inappropriate for the setting/company. Even I had put up with the bullshit for quite some time, but this weekend it came to a culmination when Josh decided to berate the Yankees (not that I honestly care if he does, but the subject isnt the point, its the manner in which he goes about it) by grabbing my shoulders and shaking me around, asking how I liked the playoffs etc. OK. Back to those of you who know me, this is simply not something I deal with. I am not a bully, but I am an alpha male figure who doesn't deal with others playing down to me or attempting to make me feel lesser - especially amongst a gathering of my friends. I could sense that everyone else was tired of the obnoxious behavior as well, so instead of just taking the bullshit and letting it go, I proceeded with the following. I grabbed Josh and calmly told him that I was tired of his bullshit everytime I saw him, everyone else was tired of it, and if he didn't do away with the grin on his face while I spoke to him that I would gladly knock it off - add in some extra uses of the word fuck in there as well.
OK lets analyze this - why was I NOT the asshole here? Well first of all, I was thanked by all others present for doing what I did. I had every right to say/do what I did, and I did it for one reason and one reason only - everyone else seems afraid/reluctant to say anything to these types of people. I do not actively seek out confrontation, I'm just a protector. I stand up for myself, as well as those who are unwilling to stand up for themselves. Its as simple as that - however, if you're like me (there aren't many of us) don't just take that stance and say you do this - ALWAYS do it. Don't slip up like I did today.
I won't get into specifics of what went down today, but I essentially pulled a mean trick on someone I don't know, who did not necessarily deserve it. It makes you think, but it also makes you feel good about your true feelings when you slip up like I did, and the 1st thought that comes to your mind is how bad you feel for the other person. I can almost blame the protector side of me for even having done this - but in the end I should have thought about the situation and why my subconscious only THOUGHT protection was needed when it really wasn't.
If I could tell everyone who doesn't understand me one thing, I think I would go with this analogy: On the outside I may seem like the bully. However, in reality I'm the person that confronts the bully because nobody else will. Just be nice to people in general - if I can honestly see the world this way, anyone can - all of you who have known me for a long time can attest to that.
Friday, November 23, 2007
Friday (early) Morning Musings
Well here we are, one day away from the Iron Bowl. I will admit that the aforementioned game is what has me up tonight, I think too much sometimes - but in all honesty I don't know if a true Auburn fan can think about this game "too much."
My many hours of thought have led me to one conclusion: AU 24-10. Done. 6. People may expect an analytical reasoning forthcoming, and you'll get one, but not in the form nor fashion you might expect... So here goes:
Auburn will win, I've said that. But, its not because of 5 in a row, not because they are the better team (although they are), and not because of some odd matchup between the teams set to do battle Saturday night in the greatest setting in all of sports - save The House That Ruth Built. No, rather it centers on ME. Those who know me may assume this is going to turn into another "that's why he's Andy" diatribes.. but there really is no conceit in this one people. Auburn will win because of me, and because of my sick string of luck as of late. I'll save you the long list of happenings, but the jist of it is - The Arkansas Experience (and physical domination on and OFF/OUTSIDE of the field), drawings coming up money in my scholastic undertakings, great success in the gym as of late, capturing the elusive Andy-Chris game that has proved difficult to track down in the past, and the Georgia loss. The Georgia loss? Yes. The Georgia loss - We'll get to this shortly.
Now, as per being a Shores by surname AND male by gender... I am not typically the "luckiest man on the face of the earth" (appropriately coined by The IRON Horse) - just ask Dad. So I take great reverance in this newly found luck and all that it entails. With that bit of background, lets get back to the story at hand - The Georgia loss.
This story begins with me - what stories have you heard me tell that don't? Me, and my plans not to venture to Athens, GA although I thought Auburn would win (WRONG.) I had my mind made up, I was working on a painting, getting ahead in my school work (yeah no shit), perfectly content with watching the rivalry on TV with my dad, despite the great time I had had in 2005 when going on the same trip. Bobby was not going, Chris - I had forgotten whether he was going, and I had no girlfriend (which according to Lore... well I guess I should just say Matt and I's interworkings of warped minds... it is vitally important for me to have a girlfriend when attending an AU-UGAy contest.
So essentially there was no reason for me to head up there. Then it all changed, The Luck popped up again - this time unbenounced to me. Matt called me, and thanks to the 1 second gap between "Cause worry's a waste of my... pause... time" in Mr. Brownstone (which I was listening to on my Ipod Mini - hahaha at the time) I heard my phone ring - coincidentally my ringtone is Mr. Brownstone as well... Matt, in his own roundabout, don't want to full-on let you know I want something way, asked if I still wasn't going to Athens and somewhat conveyed to me that he didn't know many people who we're going, so he might not have anyone to hang out with. I took this into consideration, hung up the phone, got back to painting. I pretty much felt bad about not going at this point, but decided oh well and ignored it. A few minutes went by... I decided to call Chris. Chris was of course going, his family always goes to Athens due to a family friend. This pretty much was it for me - the voice in the back of my mind was telling me to go, but I was a bit unsure as to whether or not I should listen, and I would remain this way until I actually got to Athens. But, in the end, I DID go.
Matt and I had a great trip up there, listened to some Guns - as is customary in order to achieve Money status for a trip, discussed the finer aspects of Lore and to a high degree Mark's recent involvement, all in all a good time. We arrived in Athens in decent time, then headed over to my cousin Whitney's place - theoretically our home base during this excursion. It was cool to see Whitney since it had been a few years, then she headed out to meet some friends "for a little while." This little while turned into a long while, and I was in constant contact with my boy Chris - who was frantically informing me of potential "Itsa nice" opportunities at Walker's (a bar among many in Athens.) I finally convinced Matt that we would be alright if he drove downtown, and that we would figure something out as far as driving his car back to Whitney's place.
So off we headed. At this point Chris had informed me that one of the ladies at the bar was "a fan of Mark" - Kansas' morbidly obese football coach - and this of course intrigued me. After a long ordeal of trying to park somewhere, Matt and I found a spot - all while Chris was under the assumption that I had either died or was in jail (the latter always being a strong possibility at away games) since I was taking so long to arrive. Once we arrived at the bar, Chris was right there to meet me at the entrance and pointed me towards the two "Primo... nevermind won't finish that one" chicks he knew from Athens, Karen and Caroline. I introduced myself, talked a little about Mark, corndogs, beer, the game, etc, then got straight to what I do best in social settings (aside from talking endlessly about nothing) and that is observation and calculation.
I was aware of the fact that Chris knew Caroline from his previous stints in the workforce, and I deduced that he was engaged in conversation, for the most part, with her. I thought to myself "way to go bro, I approve" then turned my attention to Caroline's roommate, Karen. Admittedly, at this point I hadn't realized that any streak of luck had begun, existed, or ever was to be, so my first thoughts were: "Wow dude, I really appreciate the vote of confidence, but ain't no way I can pull this off."
As the night wore on, Karen and I seemed to have a good deal in common - essentially everything. From Mark, to baseball/softball, various preferences, it was there. The night overall was damn fun, Chris and I got as wasted as we had ever been together, and Karen and I really connected.
Gameday - you all saw it, we lost, big, it sucked, big. - although I did get one good jab in at an ugay drunk chick who yelled "Auburn sucks" to us. I quickly responded "Everyone knows, nothing sucks like a Georgia girl" - yes, I know, fucking brilliant - you should've been there.
"So, this luck... it came to an end that night, right?" you ask... not so much. I realized The Luck as I was walking back to Matt's car. I realized as drinks were being thrown at me, barks and worse were verbally hurled my way, and the pathetic display on the field was sinking in, that while WE lost that day, I had won. I reluctantly strolled into town, had a hell of a time with my best friend, took THE best looking and most incredible girl away from those same douchebags that were heckeling me, and was on my way at that moment to hang out with those two and my brother again. I then started thinking about all that has been the recent months of my life, and how shit has been pretty nails for quite some time. For those wondering, Karen and I are doing rather well - ok so that was really just a shameless self-plug there, but oh well haha.
During the interim since that weekend came to an end, I have gotten to visit those who matter most to me (although it was a lot of driving), and alabama LOST TO LOUISIANA FUCKING MONROE AT HOME HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. So the luck is still going strong. Some may say it has to come to an end, and perhaps due to its high profile thusfar, soon. However, I disagree and here is why - The Luck isn't luck in the end. Its simply an adopted way of life that is working rather well for me. Its motivation, its what keeps me going, its what I bring to those around me.
THIS is why we win this weekend folks, because I LOVE Auburn, because positive energy really does work, and because I am still somewhat regretful that for that one weekend I was (although thankfully) able to remove myself partially from the WE that is the Auburn Family. Sure it hurt me that we lost, but it didn't hurt me enough and I intend to use the positive energy to inspire those around me, to bring my people (Rushings, Reynolds', Family) to the level I have achieved, that of can't lose. AU 24-10. Done. 6. WFEMF ($1 to CWMFM)
My many hours of thought have led me to one conclusion: AU 24-10. Done. 6. People may expect an analytical reasoning forthcoming, and you'll get one, but not in the form nor fashion you might expect... So here goes:
Auburn will win, I've said that. But, its not because of 5 in a row, not because they are the better team (although they are), and not because of some odd matchup between the teams set to do battle Saturday night in the greatest setting in all of sports - save The House That Ruth Built. No, rather it centers on ME. Those who know me may assume this is going to turn into another "that's why he's Andy" diatribes.. but there really is no conceit in this one people. Auburn will win because of me, and because of my sick string of luck as of late. I'll save you the long list of happenings, but the jist of it is - The Arkansas Experience (and physical domination on and OFF/OUTSIDE of the field), drawings coming up money in my scholastic undertakings, great success in the gym as of late, capturing the elusive Andy-Chris game that has proved difficult to track down in the past, and the Georgia loss. The Georgia loss? Yes. The Georgia loss - We'll get to this shortly.
Now, as per being a Shores by surname AND male by gender... I am not typically the "luckiest man on the face of the earth" (appropriately coined by The IRON Horse) - just ask Dad. So I take great reverance in this newly found luck and all that it entails. With that bit of background, lets get back to the story at hand - The Georgia loss.
This story begins with me - what stories have you heard me tell that don't? Me, and my plans not to venture to Athens, GA although I thought Auburn would win (WRONG.) I had my mind made up, I was working on a painting, getting ahead in my school work (yeah no shit), perfectly content with watching the rivalry on TV with my dad, despite the great time I had had in 2005 when going on the same trip. Bobby was not going, Chris - I had forgotten whether he was going, and I had no girlfriend (which according to Lore... well I guess I should just say Matt and I's interworkings of warped minds... it is vitally important for me to have a girlfriend when attending an AU-UGAy contest.
So essentially there was no reason for me to head up there. Then it all changed, The Luck popped up again - this time unbenounced to me. Matt called me, and thanks to the 1 second gap between "Cause worry's a waste of my... pause... time" in Mr. Brownstone (which I was listening to on my Ipod Mini - hahaha at the time) I heard my phone ring - coincidentally my ringtone is Mr. Brownstone as well... Matt, in his own roundabout, don't want to full-on let you know I want something way, asked if I still wasn't going to Athens and somewhat conveyed to me that he didn't know many people who we're going, so he might not have anyone to hang out with. I took this into consideration, hung up the phone, got back to painting. I pretty much felt bad about not going at this point, but decided oh well and ignored it. A few minutes went by... I decided to call Chris. Chris was of course going, his family always goes to Athens due to a family friend. This pretty much was it for me - the voice in the back of my mind was telling me to go, but I was a bit unsure as to whether or not I should listen, and I would remain this way until I actually got to Athens. But, in the end, I DID go.
Matt and I had a great trip up there, listened to some Guns - as is customary in order to achieve Money status for a trip, discussed the finer aspects of Lore and to a high degree Mark's recent involvement, all in all a good time. We arrived in Athens in decent time, then headed over to my cousin Whitney's place - theoretically our home base during this excursion. It was cool to see Whitney since it had been a few years, then she headed out to meet some friends "for a little while." This little while turned into a long while, and I was in constant contact with my boy Chris - who was frantically informing me of potential "Itsa nice" opportunities at Walker's (a bar among many in Athens.) I finally convinced Matt that we would be alright if he drove downtown, and that we would figure something out as far as driving his car back to Whitney's place.
So off we headed. At this point Chris had informed me that one of the ladies at the bar was "a fan of Mark" - Kansas' morbidly obese football coach - and this of course intrigued me. After a long ordeal of trying to park somewhere, Matt and I found a spot - all while Chris was under the assumption that I had either died or was in jail (the latter always being a strong possibility at away games) since I was taking so long to arrive. Once we arrived at the bar, Chris was right there to meet me at the entrance and pointed me towards the two "Primo... nevermind won't finish that one" chicks he knew from Athens, Karen and Caroline. I introduced myself, talked a little about Mark, corndogs, beer, the game, etc, then got straight to what I do best in social settings (aside from talking endlessly about nothing) and that is observation and calculation.
I was aware of the fact that Chris knew Caroline from his previous stints in the workforce, and I deduced that he was engaged in conversation, for the most part, with her. I thought to myself "way to go bro, I approve" then turned my attention to Caroline's roommate, Karen. Admittedly, at this point I hadn't realized that any streak of luck had begun, existed, or ever was to be, so my first thoughts were: "Wow dude, I really appreciate the vote of confidence, but ain't no way I can pull this off."
As the night wore on, Karen and I seemed to have a good deal in common - essentially everything. From Mark, to baseball/softball, various preferences, it was there. The night overall was damn fun, Chris and I got as wasted as we had ever been together, and Karen and I really connected.
Gameday - you all saw it, we lost, big, it sucked, big. - although I did get one good jab in at an ugay drunk chick who yelled "Auburn sucks" to us. I quickly responded "Everyone knows, nothing sucks like a Georgia girl" - yes, I know, fucking brilliant - you should've been there.
"So, this luck... it came to an end that night, right?" you ask... not so much. I realized The Luck as I was walking back to Matt's car. I realized as drinks were being thrown at me, barks and worse were verbally hurled my way, and the pathetic display on the field was sinking in, that while WE lost that day, I had won. I reluctantly strolled into town, had a hell of a time with my best friend, took THE best looking and most incredible girl away from those same douchebags that were heckeling me, and was on my way at that moment to hang out with those two and my brother again. I then started thinking about all that has been the recent months of my life, and how shit has been pretty nails for quite some time. For those wondering, Karen and I are doing rather well - ok so that was really just a shameless self-plug there, but oh well haha.
During the interim since that weekend came to an end, I have gotten to visit those who matter most to me (although it was a lot of driving), and alabama LOST TO LOUISIANA FUCKING MONROE AT HOME HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. So the luck is still going strong. Some may say it has to come to an end, and perhaps due to its high profile thusfar, soon. However, I disagree and here is why - The Luck isn't luck in the end. Its simply an adopted way of life that is working rather well for me. Its motivation, its what keeps me going, its what I bring to those around me.
THIS is why we win this weekend folks, because I LOVE Auburn, because positive energy really does work, and because I am still somewhat regretful that for that one weekend I was (although thankfully) able to remove myself partially from the WE that is the Auburn Family. Sure it hurt me that we lost, but it didn't hurt me enough and I intend to use the positive energy to inspire those around me, to bring my people (Rushings, Reynolds', Family) to the level I have achieved, that of can't lose. AU 24-10. Done. 6. WFEMF ($1 to CWMFM)
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